It got worse.
As soon as I was home, I went back to bed, then got up again at 10:00 AM. After morning ablutions, the sucking sound started. Joy, motivation, fresh outlook, optimism... All swirling around each other then getting sucked into the void. I lay down on the bed and thought....
- The monkey wants to curl up in a ball and hide from it all. With a bottle of beer.
- If I hide from it all, when the day is done, I will berate myself to having done nothing.
- If I get up and do things, when the day ends I will berate myself to not doing enough and for doing the wrong things.
- If I get up and do all the right things, and do enough things to feel it is enough, then I will know I entered a time warp where the work of three weeks happened in a single day.
So I got up and did stuff. Sure enough: not enough, and wasted time on stupid stuff. But at least I did stuff.
2009 is not going to be an easy year. It will be a year of much change, and I think I will come out of it well. I will learn some interesting lessons. But it will not be an easy year.
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